6.21.2021. If ain’t one thing, it’s another
Today was Monday. It is 8 days until I go on vacation. I am going to Montana to see my family, my dad, sister & brother-in-law, brother, niece and nephew. Maybe an uncle or two. I am really excited to go away and check out of my work life. Although, with MFR, I never can completely check out. There are always questions and other things to do, even when on vacation. So is the life of a business owner, heh?
In addition, it seems that whenever I go on vacation, work gets 5 times as intense, preparing to be gone, and preparing for my return. It’s a lot to think about and get done in a short amount of time.
Also, there is still so much to think about with what needs to be done to prepare for festival.
My partner is out of town, caring for and attending to her mother. Her mother had a pulmonary embolism and had surgery this morning. Minnie is in Mt. Clemens, far, far away.
For that reason and to get some putzing work done at the Farm, I chose to stay up here tonight.
I did just that: putzed around. I cleaned out my clothes totes. I strung a string of lights by Chem-Free firepit. I dipped and got 10 water samples, to be dropped off tomorrow for testing!!! I feel a fair amount of anxiety regarding these water samples. A part of me really wants to get this right, not only to get it right for MFR but also to be as good as M.
Sigh, fucking ego.
I sprayed some poison ivy.
I wandered the trails, thinking, listening, finding my ground, my peace, and doing an active meditation on the power, magnitude, majesty, and magic of this pine tree farm.
Tomorrow is a workday and I want to get in early. I have a massage scheduled for tomorrow at 4:15pm! Yay, ME! This means I need to figure out if I want to shower tonight or tomorrow morning.
I thought it would be prudent and make the most sense to shower tonight.
I was undecided if I would shower outside or inside the house. It’s supposed to get cold tonight, but it’s not cold…yet! I should take advantage of the beautiful outdoor showers, revel in the power of being free and naked, physically and emotionally, revealing my vulnerability and fear, in the forest.
I decided to shower outside.
I guess it was good that I chose this option, since a problem presented itself!!!
(Although, it sent me into a little bit of a crying jag)
The shower tripped the GFI, then when I went inside to reset the breaker, I couldn’t get the breaker to reset.
Fucking fuckity fuck fuck FUCK
After crying several tears and video calling Becky, my friend fixer from Chicago, I just decided.
Fuck it. I want these damn showers. I don’t know when the plumbing team will get a chance to look at it. I got into the damn solution and texted my electrician (new) friend from across the road.
He is coming to look at it tomorrow.
While it is important that I always try to use women providers and women volunteers, it is also important to cultivate local relationships. We live in this world together.
grateful #humble #nottooproudtoaskforhelp
So, I showered in the house. And now I sit on my patio of Polly, really quite cold, and also committed to writing every day until festival. 38 days until Vendor load in, the true MFR opening.
One of the things I saw (again) tonight, while wandering the trails, were two crows. I have seen these crows multiple times. They live close to Bruno Shuttle Path, I believe.
They were on the ground by She-Shed. They saw me and continued hunting bugs, I would imagine. They did not fly off, although, most times, they do fly off, it never appears-to be an act of fleeing the scene or danger. It appears to be more of an “Okay, I see you, you are going to be here for a while. That’s okay. I will allow you in the space. It is yours also”.
This is probably the 6th time I have seen this pair of crows so I decided to look up their spiritual meaning.
A few cultures believe they are a sign of a dark omen. However, the Native Americans and the Celtic people believe they are a good sign. Check it out:
Crow Celtic Symbolism
Like the Native Americans, Celtics also debunk the dark symbolism surrounding this bird. The Celtic crow symbol stands for individuality, prophetic knowledge, and a complete disregard for what others think. The crow embodies a combination of abilities and skills, mostly.
Celtics also deeply honor crows as a sign sent to them by prophets or oracles in a practice of clairvoyance. The Celts so believed the crows carried secrets between the feathers of their wings.
What does this mean for me? I am not sure completely.
I do realize that it is just one more confirmation that I am on the right path. That I will get the knowledge, skills, wisdom, and/or resources necessary to complete my mission.
That’s fucking awesome. No more tears for me. It’s going to be all right.